This weeks discovery that love creates our new collaboration has been so unique and yet so familiar. The end of the circle, bringing us back to the beginning. The deeper we go into the energetic exploration of our relationship, the more intense the processing and purification seems to become. Digging into places where ancient darkness comes to light, and rising up and up into vibrations of togetherness we have long since forgotten. I notice that even though each session with the herd reaches such mystical heights, in-between it is easy to forget and succumb to negativity. Maybe this is the nature of forging our way and creating a new path.
The Missing Link
At first I am feeling a pattern in our merge which is quite turbulent, there is a lot of potential, I am opening space for it. I Start to feel the circle of giving and receiving again, and feel myself easily slipping into the Stillpoint. It feels so blissful to be here in this energetic space. The bridle feels very heavy. I find myself still wondering how to join physical doing with this space… aligning the still point with the physical. I consider why this is so important to me.
The answer comes clearly… because we have bodies. I am going deeper into my body.. this being physical.. Aimée helps with this.. it seems to bring up some aggravation in the horses.. I have a sense that the horses’ faith in the doing must be restored…I am still looking for, seeking the way to align… the horses seem to be communicating something, even Rafi comes, yet I can’t feel it. Aimée put her nose on my heart several times.. then with Quaramba, suddenly I understand, love is the connection! I need to flow my love for them and do everything within that love. Shimmering, radiating love.
Despite the flies and the heat this morning there is such a lightness, a gentleness in this discovery.. such a profound comprehension. Now I am practicing this, and I feel the past lives of the horses very clearly … Quaramba’s dolphin and Marie’s whale, I feel the past separation in Gorrion and the heaviness in Rafi, the bridle feels light, it soothes and comforts.
The whole herd is very aware of the energetic dynamic we are in. It feels like such a potent channel, and I reflect that it is strange that this is not all there is… why is it so unpracticed when all of the answers are within it? Love is presence, it infuses consciousness with life.. makes feeling alive so full and rich.. a physical quality that is so vibrant.
Mind becoming body. I remembered the other day when I was taking dock plants out of the cut hay, and it occurred to me to do it with love and delicacy, and how magically this transformed the task. Then afterwards I could feel an incredible potency in being alive..
Tuesday the 23rd of June
Cleaning Up The Past
The next day there was a lot of emotional turbulence coming in from my outside life, and I decided I would work with the crystal bowl to help detoxify. It felt like the ego resisting what we had achieved the day before, and there was a dark backwash of anger, anxiety and fear. It was definitely a process of letting go!
First I had to let go of my insistence on being physically inside with the herd when I was working with the bowl. The horses were unsettled and wanted to play with it, and I felt annoyed with them. After spending some time with Mother Willow, I re-aligning with the genuine connection. I released the desire to produce a result and returned to the herd and continued. Each period of playing was less volatile, less discordant and more peaceful. By the end we felt restored as a herd, and ready to explore the next part of the journey.
Creating The New Template
I was led into the barn by the swallows, which was so perfect after reading Karen’s beautiful article about love and the role that the swallows play. I was feeling the celebration of love in the herd.. it is the in-between, the glue which fills the gaps, dissolving the separations and bringing everything into One.
Is it the perception of energy itself? I was wondering why we don’t always recognise, and feel it as that when we are connecting energetically. Then I felt in my body that love is energy from the heart centre, so maybe it must always be fully open? Perhaps then it engages the mechanism of perception… then what is consciousness?
Creating In Energy
Is consciousness awareness of the Universe… the connection with God? I am letting go of the need to understand and just feeling the love itself, sensing it everywhere. I am inviting a new collaboration in, and sensing the boundary with this, then there is a dawning realisation. This is how the new collaboration is being created! In energy first. I am bringing the intention to collaborate freely to the herd, bringing it in love. I realise that I have been training for this. Now I am feeling resistance in the herd, resistance a little like soft rubber. I sense it is from previous associations and conditionings, perhaps even from who horses are. They are their own beings.
Then I sense this resistance changing, dissipating, and going completely, yet nothing comes into its place. I am waiting… vibrating in love. There is no desire, no hope, no expectation. It is just being here, willing to open the new collaboration. Submerged within the process itself. The energy of the horses is returning in a new vibration.. it is so diverse, so colourful, so full of love, and still new and fresh and unformed. I am welcoming it, harmonising with it, celebrating it. There is such a sense of possibility. We are no longer held by any behaviours or knowledge that was. There is only this, now, the new paradigm.
Saturday the 27th of June
Love Is the Creator
Out walking with the dogs today I was thinking about this process with the horses. I understood at the beginning that I wanted to create space for an interaction which was genuinely mutual. It hadn’t crossed my mind that we would not be working with who we are now. It is becoming clear that a physical spiritual partnership like this requires a change in the actual template of who we are. Both for horses and humans.
And finally it made sense that love is the only energy which can do this. Love can change the blueprint and create a new paradigm. Unconditional, authentic love is the author of this un-manifested collaboration which is being born.